Forrest Gump once said that life is like a box of chocolate, you'll never know what you're gonna get. I say, that's bullshit. Then again, Mr Gump was retarded.

Anyway, how was Christmas? This year the only present I got was a puke faced housemate whom I had to drive home. The housemate only had 4 glasses of wine and the saddest part was that the housemate wasn't even female.

It was the first Christmas without my family and it felt really weird. No carols, no laughter, no hugs, no Merry Christmas mum or dad - just my puke faced housemate. He was like a monolithic machine that kept spewing and spewing.
___

Anyhow, a few days before Christmas, I went to a club called The Beat. It was the beat alright. It was techno monomaniacs on the first floor - picture a medium sized dance floor with only four or five people facing a huge ass mirror and dancing their willies all over the place. And yep, you guessed it, they had their neons lights. They were rigged with neons tighter than you could hook up a GTR with neons; and they were dancing? I highly question the word dancing here because shaking your body like a life size vibrator wouldn't actually be considered dancing now would it? Would it? They were more like vibrating chirstmas trees.

Brushing it aside, I continued to follow my friends to the second floor...and this was when things started to get really really REALLY suspicious. Firstly, the Dj was spinning Kylie's Na Na Na song which was followed by It's Raining Men (take a hint?) Secondly, the people there were wearing really little, not just the women, the men too. Thirdly, I was getting stares from the same sex. It was then, that I caught sight of a giant poster with two semi-naked muscular men hugging and tonguing each other....I WAS LIKE FUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCK. No wonder they called it -The Beat- cause you had guys straddling up next to one another and beating their cocks against each others ass on the dance floor.

I guess I wasn't really paranoid that it was a gay club. Hell, my housemate didn't give a shit. He even boogied his way into the middle of the dance floor. He was, of course, drunk.

It was more like, strange; you know, it's was like a chinese man walking into a malay coffee shop and asking for Char Siew Rice.

Yea, I left after 10 mins and finally figured out why two of my friends didn't want to go in at the start. Smart choice I'd say. And I rubbed the big ass club chop off, the one you need when you re-enter the club, with my sliva immediately. Didn't really want to get beaten up by people who hated faggots, not that I'm one of course. (Yes faz and boon, I'M ABSOLUTELY SURE I'M NOT A FAG.)

And yes, them vibrating chirstmas trees were gay too.

Jesus Christ Mary and Joseph!

Carol gave birth to a healthy 3 kg+ baby boy at Mt Elizabeth, 530pm Singapore time! TODAY!

Yet to be named, but I'm sure it won't be a stupid one like Gaylord.

-Bustard-

Fine, so I guess not all the bus drivers in Australia are nice and patient.
I decided to take the 427 bus instead of 428 because it took a more direct route back to my place which meant that I could get home earlier, but as I boarded the bus...

Me: "Hi, one ticket to indooroopilly... -in a polite manner-"

Diver: "PLEASE."

Me: "Sorry?"

Driver: "PLEASEEEEEE. -contorts face and mumbles some rude comment-"

Me: "Man, fuck you. I DON'T have to say please to get a ticket and ride in your shit bus."

And I walked off turning around and pointing the universal sign which only fuckheads like him are meant to see and deserve.

Like, good god, just because I'm asian, don't undermine me and think you can pull a fast one. I don't think I should be nice to fat,smelly,balding and rude bus drivers like you muthafucker.


Ended up taking the 428 home instead.


Bustard.

Out and Running....

Australia's a really famous country for all kinds of shit..more specifically, Brisbane's a really famous state for most kinds of shit, most famous, for it's fucked up weather.

I was at the coast on Saturday and I reckoned I'd get a nice brown crisp tann to put some sexiness into old fat pasty me. Brisbane being Brisbane however, pissed on my plans.

You see, I was already at the beach, getting my stuff out (beach mat, tanning lotion, booze etc) when suddenly, it started raining. I mean, for petessake, the sun was still shining when it suddenly rained. And mind you, it didn't just -rain- it freaking poured like some cow suddenly realised it could pee and decided to have a go at it for the next 2 hours.

You could imagine how pissed -I- was.

Heh. On another note, at least the bus divers here are nice to people. They're polite, patient and understading even though sometimes they can't understand what the fuck some asian students (mainly those from China) are trying to say when they board the bus..

Asian Student, " Yarlow, van teeket to kinsland unibersity prease."

Bus driver, "What? Could you repeat that please."

Asian Student, "Van stoodent teeket to kinsland unibersity. kkkinsssland....uniberrrssiiity. You know?"

Bus driver, "-dumbfounded look- Sorry? What was that? -thinks awhile- Oh, rigghtt..one ticket to QQQueeeensland University. That's a dollar ten please."

Asian Student,"Wa, 10 dollars?"

Bus driver, "No no, it's ONE dollar and TEN cents. Thanks."

Asian Student, "-spastic smile- HEEEE... ogae. Tank Kew."

I mean if I was the bus driver and I come across someone saying this kinda shit to me, I'd say, sorry, retards aren't allowed on the bus, and drive off.

I know I know, it's bad of me to say such a thing but I can't help it, I get embarrassed when I see things like that. I get even more embarassed when I have Singaporeans taking the same course as me and they can't speak proper english; nor even try to. It's embarrassing because English is suppose to be our -first- language. -Sigh- It just says alot about Singaporeans I suppose.

Anyway, back to Need For Speed Most Wanted. SLR Mclaren here I come!

-One summer day-

I was taking a fag at the balcony and I couldn't help notice my friend's armpit hairs sticking out. It reminded me of them porn stars in the 70s.

Me: "Dude, your armpit hairs look like King Kong's pubes."

Marcus: "Fuck you la kok, can't help it if I'm hairy right?"

Me: "Yea, you're so hairy they filmed a bug's life on your armpits."

Marcus: "Fuck you la kok. What do you want me to do?"

Me: " Go trim those hairs man."

Marcus: " -Contemplates- Okay lor."

-Runs and gets kitchen scissors...ones which I use to cut meat, veggies etc-

-20 mins later-

Marcus: "Oei kokster, I trim already la. King Kongs' now a sexy bitch nia. -displays armpits-"

Me: "Walau. You really trim ah? Might as well go shave off la!"

Marcus: "Zhun bo? Use what shave? Shaving blade ah?"

Me: "Yea la, and use them shaving cream also. Quite shiok."

-10 mins later-

Marcus: "Eh. King Kong's a shaven haven! Sexy bo."

Me: " -Bursts out laughing- Wa cb you really went to shave? Good luck bro. Good luck."

Marcus: "knn you bluff me issit? I thought you said shiok. Somemore say good luck for what."

-2 days later-

Marcus: "Wa CCB.The stubbles are fucking itcy and ridiculous lor. King Kong looks like he's got outbreak of black heads."



Maybe I should ask him to shave his pubes.

-Hrmm-

-devastated-
i don't know what to write about anymore these days.

maybe i should close my blog.

I'm sorry, did I scare you?

-SIGH-

I was just looking at the pics of Boon's birthday on Fat Bastard's blog and I really really wish I was there for the celebration. Looking at the smiles and retardedness of my homies really makes me homesick. SO FUCKING HOMESICK.

And the bad news is that i'm staying for the Summer Semester. Sorry guys, i don't really have a choice. Really really wishing that I didn't have to stay. Fuck.
That means I won't be back till late Jan or early Feb (at worst).

A shout to Boon and Fuz. Happy birthday to you guys. A shout to Sal, Bi and Zat too. Hope to see you all soon. Looking at chilli crab makes me miss you all even more.

-SIGH-

The Jester God.

Indeed God has a sharp wit. He made a baby named Kuan Sian. But forgot to give him brains. Sadly the brainless retard won't read this post as well but I already have a few nasty ideas on how to make him do so..anyway, so God made a baby without brains, and an even funnier thing is that God gave him a choice to study anywhere in the world but he had to choose UQ. Unfortunately, we were introduced and because my girlfriend was his friend, brainless baby and i became friends. Here's my two cents worth on the brainless baby...


1) we do NOT owe you ANYTHING. You play people out like they're meaningless entities so do not expect any sympathy or apology from us when we gladly choose to ignore a worthless troglodyte like you.

2) you're the most petulant person I know because you didn't turn up for David's ( whom YOU consider a FRIEND) birthday party because we didn't give you a birthday present which you did not deserve anyway.

3) YOU fucked up your own birthday plans and still don't realise it.


4) You fucked up your friendship with people from this semester and the first semester here.

5) You're ONE UGLY MOTHERFUCKING CHEE HONG KIA WITH A GIRLFRIEND.

6) You're a MOTHERFUCKER.

7) You're not ALL THAT. You're as "ALL THAT" as shit is useful to a a deaf person.

8) You're an AH BENG wanna be with an AH LIAN girlfriend who controls you like a dog.

9) You're a dog.

10) You're the only BRAINLESS DICKHEAD in the entire world who thinks NCC is tougher than NS.

11) You do not call people when you cancel meetings or outings. people are always calling and finding out from you last minute that you cancel.

12) YOU OWE FELICIA AN APOLOGY FOR SHOUTING AT HER OVER THE PHONE ON YOUR BIRTHDAY.

13) There is a prediction that you're gonna have majorly fucked up kids who look like you when you do become a dad. Orcs should not have children.

Dug up some old stuff -

Entitled: Poetry DUH!

Wondering thoughts
That are written by obedient fingers
That refuse to be spoken
But on the tip of my tongue
Linger

A wondering voice
That is unspoken
Replaced by a myriad of words
The silence is
Broken

Eyes closed inwardly
A simple reflection of a verse
Something spontaneous
Nothing rehearsed
Poetry

Perhaps this will make him say something useful.



I love you too, bro.

-Drake.

What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?



an ass which makes you cry.

Well, he asked. Nah:


A cold, wet sort of Magic.


Weather's lovely.

Had the fuck-off heaviest spate of rain just now. Not the usual half hearted oh-all-right-here's-some kind of affair, no. Someone up there was really laying this one on thick.

It started with a distinct, unusual chill, which I appreciated immensely. The heat here in Teh Cubicle (Room. Which is the size of rich people's wardrobes.) is so bad I sometimes just give up trying to do things, close my eyes, and surrender.

Then, the periodic rolls of thunder, irregular but persistent. Deep, lengthy, rumbling growls of bass; the type you both hear and feel.

The rain then began, but instead of the usual bucket-in-your-face approach as storms here are wont, it...crept. An indistinct rustle at first, making you second-guess yourself, both hopeful and suspicious. Teasingly, it grew from whisper to audible patter, then loud, wet splats. Finally, almost as if it realized no one could do fuck-all about it, it burst into full glory, the water gaining a joyous, defiant sort of voice from the relentless assault of water on various surfaces, so fast and thick as to obscure the next block in a white sheen.

Lovely. I really like this particular type of storm, these periods of intense rain with no irritatingly loud, boastful thundering. Loud yet at the same time quiet; the roar of rain slowly becoming a sort of endearing prescence that encompasses, enfolds everything else. Undeniable force and energy somehow become a queerly serene thing, and you can focus on either on its own merit, or deliciously linger in the middleground possible only here, wonderful each and every time.

Or, for total immersion (Pun, uh, ambiguous), run out and stand in classic silver-screen cliche, face to the heavens. Let it envelope you, initial individual ticklish trickles none-too-gradually losing themselves in the enormity of the affair, as the sweet, sweet rain wraps you head to toe, plastering hair to scalp, clothes to skin, blurring, then almost obscuring vision. In gleeful darkness, feel the rain, its wet embrace tracing your every contour, dripping off your chin, earlobes, fingertips. And know an indescribable, quiet joy.

Nah, didn't do it. Would be mighty weird, standing between two blocks of flats like that. Plus, the cheebye street lamps and such detract from the romanticism of it all. The proper place for this is by the sea, where in addition to the rain, you can hear the laughter of the sea in the storm, and where the wind properly whips the rain into scintillating sheets. The air has a distinct, crisper quality, and the sheer expanse of open sky just completes a truly magnific experience.

Been some time since the last I did that. Maybe I should make a point to go again. The whole feeling like a jackass afterwards; a very wet, soggy jackass, is kinda detrimental though. Plus, it'll be in East Coast. Other side of damned island.

But y'know, I think that quiet, indescribable joy was well worth it.

-Drake

Condoms make the world go round.

Why did kamikazi pilots wear seat belts?

Morning after pills makes a woman fuck more.

Condoms makes the man a whore.

it's been raining a lot recently;

i love the rain.
the smell
the sound
so mysterious.
so nostalgic.

- as i close my eyes, letting raindrops pelt against my face. embracing the moment whilst my mind dances in the puddles of imagination; inadequacies of my past, misconceptions of my future and the boon ( no pun intended tim) of now.



meh,what a gay moment.

It's the 21st of August, 5 weeks or Uni feels like an eternity of work.
But, as always, Mr khum chan here always finds time to unwind.
And the results include winning $200 at the Casino. -blink-
That's with a base capital of $50 mind you.
Impressive for 1 hour worth of bright lights, ciggie smoke, drunk players, talking to a funky dealer and finger therapy, right?
Gotta love Black Jack or as the dealer says, "Treasury 21 Sir!"
***
Went to the Ekka last week. It's was, as usual, ghastly over-priced, crowded, hot and cattle smelling. The company however, was fantastic. Other than the $3.40 bottle of coke which i purchased, the time spent there was quite fun la. Rode this kick ass ride aptly named the Claw because after you ride it, you feel as if your insides have been clawed inside out. Like #%^&^!*@%! kinda feeling. Everyone felt this way, Jodie, Kelly, Felica, Momo and myself. Sweet.
***
Need to sell backside for a Suzuki Swift GTi FWD 1990 =p

Engine:
Forged JE items joined with Crower con-rods and with modified crank.
The head ported and polished with oversized valves operated by turbo cams.
Modified oil cranks to increase oil pressure.

Induction:
Intake manifold with custom inlet and the airbox on the other side of the car. Throttle body that is a 52mm item with 8 injectors 4 of the injectors to operate at over 12 psi boost.
Injectors operated by a MoTeC M4 Pro engine management system (EMS).
A garrett TO35 turbo, capeable of pushing out a maximum 30psi when the car is running avgas. Custom made air to air intercooler.

Exhaust:
A custom made manifold which runs into two 2.5 inch pipes.
An actuator which is opened under boost to allow then engine to breath better.
Twin pipes system which runs into a high flow catalytic converter with a 3 inch muffler and tip.

Drivetrain:
Factory five speed with two modes for FWD and 4WD.
Flywheel rebalanced and mates to the clutch which has a heavy duty pressure plate and a kevlar clutch plate.
FWD system with two Suzuki sports LSDs.

Wheels, Tyres & Brakes:
Rolling stock, 16x6.5 interMilano with 205/40 R16 Falkens.
Standard Swift GTi four wheel disks brakes with Suzuki Sports pads.

"You keep me flying
You keep me smiling
You keep me safe in a crazy world
You understand me
Embrace my fragility
You keep me safe in a crazy world
And in your arms I find the strength to believe in me again"

it's you my dear grandfather. you are missed.

Mr Ed went berserk.

And so it is, like they said it should be,
never kick a horse while it's taking a piss.
Not that it was intentional...and so the story goes,
The horses were crossing a river, but this particular horse stopped when it came to the edge of the river. Naturally the rider thought the horse was afraid to cross, and gave the poor horse a good kick on its sides not knowing that the horse was, infact, pissing into the river. Hence after finishing pissing and many kicks at its side, the horse went, well berserk and nearly threw the rider off.
So lesson learnt: never kick a horse while it's pissing; even if its doing so into the river, which runs to our water supply for drinking and bathing.
***
If you're a novice rider, try to avoid trotting on a horse, especially if you're a guy and you honestly cherish your testicles.
***

you kissed my ass and left a milo-stained lip mark.

Evening went
And morning came
But the boy refused to sleep
In an empty room with the lights on
With a cigarette
And his sad song
Every waking minute
Hangs around his neck
Like a slow execution
His blood shot eyes
And blistered fingers
He yearns for her touch
Not knowing what anything feels like anymore
Broken shattered and teethered to bone
Boy's alone

Currently listening to Jay's Yi Lu Xiang Bei from the Initial D movie.
Feeling a little this and that. I'm not sure what.
I have a sinking feeling in me.
And I feel absolutely depressed.
I shouldn't be right? I mean I just got two distinctions for my exam.
I feel like the song.

I hate myself.

There have been many break-ups recently.
Maybe it's the weather; the sun and then the unexpected rain.
The humidity.
Or maybe it's because it's July.
You know what they say about July
(actually -I- don't, and who the fuck are they?)

Finally got my handphone line back.
So if anyone wants to hollar me up, please do so at
+6598380072.

No queer fucks please.

"And I still miss her even though..
The freshness that lingers on my lips after..
Softness of her touch everytime she...
Her scent which emits from her body after every..
The eyes that would sent the world into a frenzy with just a...
It's just you my...
There would be no vivification without you".

"just to feel
to feel you here with me
just to hear you whisper
the words that are priceless to me
just to know you more
to be with you
to lose myself in you
is all I want
all I want
just to be where you are"

I is back in Singapore.

And I look like a fish ball...

Will continue to look like one for the next three weeks.

It's my birthday today. i'm suppose to be happy. I guess.

But turning 23 or any other age since a year ago seems different now.

I miss my grandpa. He used to send me a birthday card every year.

I feel empty without his words. Without his writing. Without his love.

-Sigh- hey grandpa if there is anway you can hear me, know that you are still missed.

loving you always.
Your grandson.

Sun, sand, sea, surfing and then some...

I'm pretty darn sure that everyones' heard about the
Schapelle Corby crap.

Well if you haven't, here's a summary.
In October 2004 Schapelle Corby set out with her family on a 10 day holiday
in Bali to enjoy the beach and the surf. Instead of happy holiday memories and a sun tan she has endured a harrowing nightmare burned with humiliation and injustice.
She was busted for possession of drugs and she's now doing time in prison.

20 years.

I can't say if she's innocent or not but the way the Australians are reacting to
the entire situation isn't doing anything beneficial for political ties between
Australia and Indonesia.

Can you believe these fucking aussies. Just because the indons locked her up
they want their Tsunami funds returned. What about the poignant memories of pain and suffering that millions had to endure in indonesia while australians sat in their warm cosy houses during Christmas? Like, how fucked up is that?
Don't these Aussies realise that it's not entirely indonesia's fault that Schapelle is behind bars but their own fault as well? Blame it on the loop hole in the airport system you wankers. Baggage handlers and other airport workers are said to be part of a drug smuggling syndicate. Some even say that the pilots are in it too. So why direct such animosity toward the indonesians when the problem has to be first addressed at their door step. Quit blaming the Indons and spouting profanities at them. It's your fucking fault too.

It's a wonder really. Where has humanity gone to?

***

Watched SAW today. It was fucking wicked. I highly recommend the movie.
Even though the production was cheap and the only famous actor was danny glover,
the whole idea behind the movie rocked. Be warned though, it can have rather disturbing side effects.

Man You...
dammit. looks like i'm gonna be poor next friday; M3's birthday...and drunk.
Owe him 5 shots all thanks to Man U losing the FA CUP via penatly shoot out.

Exams are in about three weeks time. And I have a paper on my birthday...again.
It's been like this for 2 years now. Anyone who calls me and wishes me any well wishes
is gonna get a rude awakening from me.

Was a victim of racism today. With four aussies driving past me and my friends
shouting something along the lines of.."YOU ASIAN WHORE."
And with me replying, "FUCK YOU."
I mean it's like, what's your mulfunction you numbnut?
-sigh-

my world becomes her stage
where she sings
and dances
and reads
from soliloques to prose to poetry
she becomes every entry and exit
she recites and toys with alliteration
words become her haven
my world becomes her stage
of enduring love
of unrequited hate

And so, after spending 72 hours in Singapore, I'm sick - flu to be exact.
The perils of humidity, dust and singlish.

Amazing discoveries 101

my sister -in-law is pregnant.

my dad got baptised. his Christian name is Bruno.

i have an exam on Wednesday

i don't know what to study

the most expensive coffee is made from beans digested and excreted by a cat
in some ulu country

the country with the most number of english speaking people in the world is India.

to destroy africa all you would need is a pore pack to peel off all the black heads.

humans can drink water even when they're upside down

chimpanzies like to smoke.

i'm in love with a wonderful woman.

Debauchery weekend retreat : High on coffee. Addicted to kisses. Drunk on love.

stress is my poison and ike is my remedy.

She sells sea shells by the sea shore - and probably more.

Captain's Log, 2050. AD (I think) 12.32 am - to explore a toliet where no man has wanked in before: There are a total of five..no wait, six, no wait! SEVEN in the crew.

Commanding Officer A.R.L.G.X. Also known as Andrew Royce Lim Guan Xian. Highly trained in sweet talking women and siphoning information from them. Master in hairstyling and zippo tricks.

Then comes the 2nd in command; (COSC) Commanding Officer Second in Command, simple yet not so simple but simply known as Marcus. Or slightly more confusingly known as Marky Mark Marketing, even slightly more confusing know as M3. Gifted with the skill of puking, inhuman facial contortions and has high penis gropping tendancies while sleeping on a friend's bed.

Navigation Officer Felicia Toh is next. Nicknames include, iKe, tampon box instructions reader (TBIR), (MGFSIHAPF) My Guy Friend Said I Have A Pad Face, resident whiner, Brat and White haired monster. Specialities include being proficient in many different languages, pinching people's most sensitive parts, slapping the toilet cleaner's favourite hat and asking for massages. She can't read maps nor navigate for shit.

Kitchen Crew include Kelly from the distant star known as Sing-A-Pore, Jodie from the very distand star known as Hong-K-Ong and Wendy from a distant distant star known as Tai-w-An. Three hot babes to serve hot food to the rest of crew. Hardwoking, funny, photogenic and multilingual. Excellent with choping boards, ingredients and food presentation. Hobbies include, cooking cooking cooking and bitching. Always present and never forgotten.

Last and the scummest of the crew is the Latrine Cleaner, Specialist Donald. (LCS) More commonly known as the toilet cleaner, Don Don, double d and Quacks. Specialities include wearing caps, looking cool while washing toliets and getting his cap smacked by the N.O from time to time. Chill out sessions include cleaning unflushed toliets, biting crew members and digging his nose.

Recent explorations include the LCS's abode and a distand distant distant distant star know as StradbrokeIsland together with a spaceship load of non pork eating martians. Findings include strong winds, seas with different hues of blue, soft sand, very wet sand, sand which read fucke, scantily clad aliens running on weird sand and, sluts. Much evidence was taken with secret new age unseen and unheard of spy technology know as digital cameras! (WOAH!). Rewards include red faced crewship members, seeing the Commanding Officer's huge backside, learning that the Navigation Officer has a parallex error when it comes to catching objects and watching the COSC's face nearly getting annihilated with a primitive weapon known as a soccer ball.

Crew members shall continue to embark on malicious journeys throughout the far far away galaxy known as Downunder a Woman's Skirt whilst having orgasms on new found activities on the battleShip, that whizzes faster than a fly in outter space, known as the DMMSYF (Don't Make Me Slap Your Face).

End Log.

The white smoke - the people have been answered...supposedly.

And so the Catholic Church has a new Pope.

German, 78. And chose the title, Benedict the 16th. Well done.

He's probably gonna die soon.

I don't know why they bother.

Displeased, I am with the decision..

But whatever the case, God has His plans well drawned out.

And so rises a new Servant of God, from the slience of death.
Go and sow what you may of God's people entrusted to you. In your divinity Lord you have placed your hands and granted a new servant unto us.
Grant that he may lead us well and honourably, but let Your will be done, not his.

The raucous of a Psychologist to be, maybe, perhaps, perchance
- if I don't fuck up.

Woke up today with a rather disturbing recollection of the nonsense that I ranted
on with ike yesterday. Treetop Inc. Where francais was the language that bewitched
my simplistic mind, regaling me with tales of stars and how they came about.
It was all good, till she pushed me down the tree-top; and jolted me awake.

As a psychologist to be*(see above)* I've become brainwashed to believe that
my countenance and hopeful originality will fall pray to the malicious mundanity
of - research - Whilst fellow psychopathologist/psychologist are encouraged to come in and chat about their work with one another and even present short papers, hence with the high probability of finding myself in socialised setting that would be hypnotically congenial. I need to study under an aegis of a strong mind.

On the other hand, whilst getting myself a free ass massage on the way home on a lump of metal that seemed to take the shape of a bus, I chanced apon something that almost got thrown me out of the bus; for apparently an asian kid laughing hysterically over something he'd read is not something tolerated nor accepted even in such (in my opinion) a convict-style upbringing society. Fucking troglodytes - and so it goes, the passage read: 'It was dawning to me that the whole way in which people have hitherto viewed in mental illness has been philosophically suspect. The division between doctor and patient has corresponded to an unwarranted epistemological assumption - we're really finding out the extent to which all the catagories, devoid of real content, representing only the taxonomic, psychic fascism of a gang of twisted old men." - and I forgot to mention BALD too.

Oh well. Back to reality - sleep.

je`tamie

Explicitly for voodoo dicks, or so they say.

Woke up pretty late today. Lazy sunday syndrome kicked in as usual.
Sleeping most of my life away, so much so that I felt i woke up with a hang-over.
-blink-

the body clock routine is totally messed up. -shrugs-

Met the group again today.
Went to catch Guess Who? with Guanxian, Marcus and Kelly
then ajourned to Cyber for some brainless rantings, with Wendy and Felly
joining us later.
It's good to know that there are still people out there who are humane,
funny and on the same wavelength as you. It's reassuring. Perhaps it's the innate
yearning to feel wanted at times. As they say, we're naturally social animals. Perhaps it's
the incapcity of humans to learn about themselves without mingling with others;
-the casuality of a difference makes the sum of a whole; a deeper understadning of
yourself. Loneliness is an anathema to the soul.

Well, hopefully.

Ah vell, time to hit the sack. The bed beckons.


Sorry about the arm. Couldn't help biting it. You know who you are.
-blink-

Omnipotent beings seem like distant stars
that strain to shine in the fading of the night
while overbearing day regains consciousness and takes flight.
Blotting all disillusionment of evening fall
where the restless wake and prance around in shades of shadows
formed when moonbeams shine on them.

The senses of my being flee, rendering me useless to what ifs and whathaveyous.
What do you not have?

Like understanding the Ur-bororo, whatever the hell that is. The ignominy of bullshit scares me not! Ha!
There seems to be a pile of crap on my floor and a teetered noticed board on my wall festooned with notes such as:

DO DIRTY SMELLY SHIT STAINED LAUNDRY, CLEAN DIRTY FART SMELLING ROOM, PAY OVERDUE BILLS, WALK THE DOG.

An iffy book the quantity theory of insanity theory is. One must be insane to try and quantify insanity. A paradox of a stupid person trying to write about stupid people in the stupidest book ever written. Brilliant! Bravo! Bravo! (A rather excoriating review don’t you think?)

Incoherent. That’s me right now. Staring at a square that’s going blink blink with numbers and words appearing and meaning absolutely fuck to me. FUCK.

FUCK alright. I’m drunk.

And I don’t even have a fucking dog to walk.

No more wealth management please!

Maybe I shouldn't have taken the elective, I totally hate it. -bleah-
Oh well I thought it was gonna be easy but...-sigh- nevermind.

Had the mid semester exam for it today,
Hope that I can score well.
Went over to Jill's place for some help and looked at work till 2ambefore bunking over yesterday.

We're not together anymore.
Yea I dumped her.
Well dumped is kinda harsh..we're just not together anymore.
But we're still friends I guess, after all, I've known her since first semester.
***

Went back to school for group project for a while.
Then met up with guanxian, felicia, marcus, wendy and guanxian's other friend, maddie.
Went to this thai place for dinner.
Wasn't great at all, every dish was too sweet. -shrugs-
Had a great time laughing it out and getting to know new people.
I feel like i'm just begining to live a life in Aussie. Amen!

Headed down to three monkeys after that where the clowning continued.Amazing really, haven't had so much fun in ages.

And it's especially soothing after anexam paper. Fantastic really.

Looks like it's gonna be a weekly affair.

Sweet ass.

"all we are is part of everything it's out of our control and i'll say all you need to know is anything that's happening is happening" All that I know - Get Up Kids

republished for felicia's amusement

It's been a while since I last blogged.
Currently happy at my new place.

No doggie poo whatsoever.

No more walking around the house in sandals!!!
and it's pretty close to everything you can ever need.
The room's not that spacious but it's neat nevertheless.
It's got ducted air-con so that's a plus. It's carpeted too.
Which keeps the feet warm when it gets really cold.

Finally had some life in Brisbane after such a long time,
other than the games that I'm addicted too.
Actually went to a KTV called JJs which is in Chinatown.
Pretty cheap when there are about 6 pepople goin.
And fun too cause the people can actually sing.

Especially the girls, they really rocked.

And felicia CAN actually sing even though I label her retarded ever so often.

Met a few new people, this dude called GuanXian and this other HK-SG girl. T
here was this other guy called terence and this other girl as well, can't recall her name really. Well perhaps cause it was in Chinese. But hey, she does sing pretty damn well if I do say so myself.

A pretty fun bunch of people i must say.
Let's hope the friendship lasts in the long run!

Currently blogging from a friend's laptop. She's sleeping behind me as I'm doing so.

And snoring.
And it's amazing cause she actually talks rubbish when she's deprived of sleep. Sadly she's wearing a CJC PE shirt to sleep. O.o Just can't understand that really.

What's with the fascination of colloecting different T-Shirts from different schools?
I mean okay fine she was an ex CJCian but aiyar.. -bleah-

Oh she's felicia. Yea the same felicia that I call retarded ever so often.

Anyway I'm off to sleep, at 6am Brisbane time.

In a pink bed covered with pink sheets.
And stuffed toys everywhere and drapped in pink linen. O.o

Isn't a guest bed nice?

No more wealth management please!

Maybe I shouldn't have taken the elective, I totally hate it. -bleah-
Oh well I thought it was gonna be easy but...-sigh- nevermind.

Had the mid semester exam for it today,
Hope that I can score well.
Went over to Jill's place for some help and looked at work till 2am
before bunking over yesterday.

We're not together anymore. Yea I dumped her. Well dumped is kinda harsh..
we're just not together anymore.
But we're still friends I guess, after all, I've known her since first semester.
***
Went back to school for group project for a while.
Then met up with guanxian, felicia, marcus, wendy and guanxian's other friend.
Went to this thai place for dinner.
Wasn't great at all, every dish was too sweet. -shrugs-
Had a great time laughing it out and getting to know new people.
I feel like i'm just begining to live a life in Aussie. Amen!

Headed down to three monkeys after that where the clowning continued.
Amazing really, haven't had so much fun in ages. And it's especially soothing after an
exam paper. Fantastic really.

Looks like it's gonna be a weekly affair.


Sweet ass.

"all we are is part of everything it's out of our control
and i'll say all you need to know is anything that's happening is happening"
All that I know - Get Up Kids

From fairest creatures we desire increase,
That thereby beauty's rose might never die,
But as the riper should by time decease,
His tender heir might bear his memory:.
But thou contracted to thine own bright eyes,
Feed'st thy light's flame with self-substantial fuel,
Making a famine where abundance lies,
Thy self thy foe, to thy sweet self too cruel:
Thou that art now the world's fresh ornament,
And only herald to the gaudy spring,
Within thine own bud buriest thy content,
And, tender churl, mak'st waste in niggarding:
Pity the world, or else this glutton be,
To eat the world's due, by the grave and thee

It's been a while since I last blogged.
Currently happy at my new place. No doggie poo whatsoever.

No more walking around the house in sandals!!!

and it's pretty close to everything you can ever need.
The room's not that spacious but it's neat nevertheless.
It's got ducted air-con so that's a plus.
It's carpeted too. Which keeps the feet warm when it gets really cold.

Finally had some life in Brisbane after such a long time, other than the games
that I'm addicted too. Actually went to a KTV called JJs which is in Chinatown.
Pretty cheap when there are about 6 pepople goin. And fun too cause
the people can actually sing. Especially the girls, they really rocked.

And felicia CAN actually sing even though I label her retarded ever
so often.

Met a few new people, this dude called GuanXian and this other HK-SG girl.
There was this other guy called terence and this other girl as well, can't recall her name
really. Well perhaps cause it was in Chinese. But hey, she does sing pretty damn well
if I do say so myself.
A pretty fun bunch of people i must say. Let's hope the friendship lasts
in the long run!

Currently blogging from a friend's laptop.
She's sleeping behind me as I'm doing so. And snoring.
And it's amazing cause she actually talks rubbish when she's deprived of sleep.
Sadly she's wearing a CJC PE shirt to sleep. O.o Just can't understand that really.
What's with the fascination of colloecting different T-Shirts from different schools?
I mean okay fine she was an ex CJCian but aiyar.. -bleah-

Oh she's felicia. Yea the same felicia that I call retarded ever so often.

Anyway I'm off to sleep, at 6am Brisbane time.

In a pink bed covered with pink sheets.
And stuffed toys everywhere and drapped in pink linen. O.o

Isn't a guest bed nice?

Move move, moving in 24 hours. No more smelly corners for us.

Work work, work piling in. -projects-

Hols hols, holidays in two weeks.

and to C who's in UBC, -pat-

You'll see him soon. 4 months do go by pretty fast,
especially since you're as busy as me.

see you soon, hopefully, maybe.

"Stop dragging feet.We can't go back for seconds lost.
Smooth the sheets.
Noone was here and never will.
Wind your watch for seconds gone.
Drive by don't stop.
Hate wins don't stop.
Guilt won't let you because you let it
.Because you lost." - Thinking, that's all by Jimmy Eat World.

woke up today after dreaming about my grandpa.

and i cried. uncontrollably.

how i wish i could have been there before he died.
when he asked for me on the hospital bed.

messing his hair was a favourite past time of mine.
and i won't be able to do it anymore.

dear grandpa,

i'm sorry, i really miss you, sorry i wasn't there before your last breadth.
not a day goes by that i don't think about you.

i wish i could hug you once again

Love,
your aching heart grandson,
Donald.

silly things you read off the net 101

There are three types of people in this world. Those who can count, and those who can't.

and also see

ryan has a big dog. her name is paws. ryan also owns 2 hamsters. their names are hammie and poopie. they live in a cage and ryan is fattening them up with all the food he gives them. he will barberque them and eat them one day. ryan tells me his favourite foods are bbq hamsters and deep fried dog with rabbit stew. he will eat paws when she's fat enough, together with his brother's rabbit. but paws is taking a long time to fatten up and he is getting very impatient. and i am very bored that's why i'm writing this. ryan has weird eating habits. u have to believe me because i'm his girlfriend. and i love him very much. the end.
(sorry ryan i stole this from your friendster)
***
Uni has officially started.

All I have to say is (@)!*#@!&!^#@!%^@!$!!.

"People who see me think I vibe on the attention
I just think they're hoping that they'll be getting a mention
But I don't know what their chance is
Of ever finding their feet
And if they know what to dance is
The kind of people I don't meet" - Badly Drawn Boy

Back in brisbane.

Lonely.

Dusty.

Squeaky floors.

A spastic dog
And it's uber far from school.

I wish i was home.

-clicks heels together-

Nope.
Not happening.

"It's freezing in Bristol
There's love on the telly
A girl grinning at me
She's doing the shimmy" - Veruca Salt

Going home in 24 hours.

it's chinese new year today; and 13 days before i head back to brisbane.
the usual reunion dinner with family and all, and the usual count-down to a
prosperous year ahead of us. something was missing this year; well more like
someone. i really miss you grandpa.

***
went to the beach with tim and gops yesterday. got ourselves really really fried.
i'm like red again. and it hurts, especially whenever i accidentally scratch myself.
fuz and sal came down later with the hopes of cycling but the timing was crap so
they ended up just chilling on the beach.

***
oh well. i've yet to pack nor buy stuff to bring back to brisbane for that matter.
maybe i'm lazy. maybe i'm just reluctant to go back.

***

the lawn mower has finally decided on brisbane. at least that's something she's
finally got settled. i'm sure she'll enjoy brisbane. yes yes, there may be a lot of
anal people there but hey, at least it's a slightly different lifestyle.
(pass me the luggage; wait it's a small one right?)

***

"Down the lane, I breathe out loud in half frozen air.
And the black amnesia's in heaven
are lighting a half moon on the stairs.
And I bite my lip when I breath out loud.
Wrapped in Japaneses paper all the wayaround. " -The Promise Ring

Watched Kinsey today. Surprisingly it was quite disappointing.

Oh well, to much hype about it perhaps.

Or perhaps it was one of those things when someone has a high expectation

of something but it turns out dodgey..

Someone has been on a pop-corn rampage since coming home; even tried to ration

me a single pop-corn for the entire movie.

-FAT HOPE- try it one more time and -I- will stick a flower in -your- head. -laughs-

***



Caught up with Tim, Sally and Fazil after. Headed down to Coffee Club in town.

It's a rarity that the four of us spend

time together anymore these days.

Oh well, I guess the apparent -growing up phase- has finally sunk in.

We're all moving towards different aims in life and methinks

we're definitely learning to appreciate each other more.

God I love my buddies.

***



Mum told me some -not very good news- today. -SigH-

All I can say is I hope for the best.





And a miracle.





"Is it my imagination

 Or have I finally found something worth living for?

 I was looking for some action

 But all I found was cigarettes and alcohol"  - Oasis

mary had a little lamb little lamb little lamb
mary had a little lamb little lamb little lamb
and it was white as snow
and everywhere that mary went
the lamb would suck her toe

anyway...for what i did today. Read Vel's blog.
I'm feeeling lazy.


damn you vel! -laughs-

"lost in a daydream. in spite of everything. candy coated sparkle haze that sends me away.
I'm a million times gone.
until the suns sets for the last time.
until the ocean burns.
I won't fall asleep in this old house.
saccharin in my veins.
these days go by and no one really knows how to do the real math, the real chemistry.
and when the world blows up,
I'll hold your hand when the big bomb drops,
I'll hold your hand because you rock." this afternoon's malady - jejune


feeling in a whatyoumightcallit mood again. a mixture of jejune thoughts of this and that. like a pill that's hard to swallow but that doesn't taste so bad. perhaps it's the the midnight silence that creeps into my ears, prying out every unspoken emotion in me. perhaps it's the way my morbid mind percieves my memories and experiences. it's like a black and white photo wanting to have colour and substance.

perhaps it's my future that i thus contemplate. my degree, my honours and then what. masters or PhD. and on to the dreaded world of working life. there seems to be an emptiness in this vehement persuit of these goals. what are wanted are known, but will having i want satisfy me. my family comes into the picture very often. the siblings are young and untrained while the parents are old and strained. my feet are on solid ground. but adaptation is needed for unpredictable circumstances. maybe i'm a happy pill trying hard to dissipate the sadness that lingers all around but maybe this pill isn't effective enough. perhaps i'll also take hamlet's advice and shut the fuck up now, for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. -laughs-

haven't heard from the lawn mower. maybe she's broken down for real this time. -bleah-

"Now cracks a noble heart. Good-night, sweet prince,
And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!"

-blink-

Fat Farm Summit

watched being julia today. talk about 18th century satire and breaking all it's rules. with things from homosexualty to scandals to self-realisation to emancipation of women to schizophrenia. with laughs from start to end, it was a well spent 6.50. 4 out of 5 popcorns. 4 because as charming and fantastic as annette bening was in the film, she was a total bitch in the end.

***
had lunch with tim and sally and my mum. had loads of fun. had some viet con thingy for lunch; vite con chicken rice, char siew and some soup followed by kaya toast and pineapple tarts for dessert. sweet ass fattening session eHz. -blink-

met daf and vel after.

what do you get when you put 3 psychologist together?

3 psychos-lost-it.

especially when they start getting trigger happy with their cameras. yup, it's sua ku land time; like a couple of long lost friends who haven't seen each other in eons and er seemingly have never ever seen shaw center before.

superb indeed.

"When I say I'm in love with her. What does that mean? It means I review my future and my past in the light of this feeling. It is as though I wrote in a foreign language that I am suddenly able to read. Wordlessly, she explains me to myself. Like a genius, she is ignorant of what she does." Jeanette Winterson, "The Passion"


it's comforting to know that i've made a mistake about my parents.
love reveals itself in the simplest way ever. "Dearest Wife..."

and my heart was reassured.

" Now we are tall, and Christmas trees are small,
and you don't ask the time of day.
But you and I, our love will never die,
but guess we'll cry come first of May." first of may - bee gees

listening to: greyscale by jejune

no matter what anyone says i'm still pretty much the emo junkie.
guitar chords run through my veins like cocaine.

went to watch shutter with miss lawn mower today.
it wasn't all that bad. neither was it all that scary. and it had a rather original ending.
the thais have a way of doing things; not to mention always adding tinges of tranny jokes into them.
i hereby bestow apon them *3 popcorns.* that's er, out of 5.

listening to: regrets are unanswered dreams by jejune

ate pretty damn alot today. had tapanyaki with v at bishan as appetizer. then went to coffee bean for koohi and some taiwanese snack pwock pwock thingy which was actually laden with pwock pwock salt and pepper. met with tim and sal after for some midnight grub at the railway station coffee shop where we desecrated 1 bowl of mee soto, 1 bowl of mee rubus, 1 order of you tiao, 1 order of char kway teow, 10 pieces of tutu and 10 pieces of otah; washing it down with a coffee for tim, a teh ice for me and a lime juice for sal. yes we are piggy.

listening to polaris by jimmy eat world

v and i pretty much castigated relationships today. for the most part we were just blabbering about how certain ideals in life were pretty much moulded by the way we were brought up. of how specific wants, needs and fancies were mirrored apon certain memories and experiences that in my opinion, subtlely cling onto our minds. v's pretty much sure of what she wants in life. she knows pretty much what she wants to achieve academically. she's also quite firm on the type of guy/man she wants in a relationship. as for me, she says that i need to be firm on what i want to achieve in life. she also feels i have a lot of angst in me. then again, she also said that she needs to know me better as well. perhaps she does indeed. -blink-

oddly enough when i got home, carol had a rather long talk with me. on relationships as well. she mentioned about faye and claudia which caught me by surprised. perhaps, said she, i should look for someone with the same set of values as me. for at the end of the day, said she again, values mould a person, apart from experience. -shrugs- i guess she's right. oddly enough she also said that whoever gets me will be a really happy person. -laughs- i love carol. i love my family. each and everyone of them. they're the happiest thing that has ever happened to me.

listening to: if this ain't love by groovejet


anyhow i'm quite excited about friday. i'm gonna be french.

as for now, i hope i don't have to sing do rei me again.



"i'm done there's nothing left to show
try but can't let go
are you happy where you're standing still
do you really want the sugar pill
i'll wake up tomorrow and i'll start
as the train approaches , getting on
as i'm sure your kiss remains employed
am i only dreaming?" polaris by jimmy eat world

it's almost 7 am.
my body clock is screwed. oh well.

gonna watch Shutter with miss squirmish later.
maybe even catch ocean's 12 after that.

hope it's a scary movie else i'll throw my shoe at the screen.

"Oh yea. all right.
Somebody's Heine.
is crowding my ice box
somebody's cold one is giving me chills
guess i'll just close my eyes." - Weezer